I sometimes think mother nature would enjoy listening to death metal.

Blog 8

Hiya, been without internet. We're without water at the moment as well. 

We had an amazing thunderstorm the other night. It was so unbelievably loud, and the lightening rather than being fork, was blanket, which lit up an eerie and sharply silhouetted panorama. Everything seemed more animated. It was as if the trees had nearly been caught out mid stride and were acting frozen just long enough for the flash to dissipate . Sometimes it was brighter than day. On some of the more intense flashes I felt an urge to turn away, as if witnessing an atomic explosion. It felt so violent and electrical that it didn't seem natural. It felt like an intimidating show of power. The amount of water that fell out the sky defied belief. The noise of it hitting all the corrugated tin roofs sounded more like gravel being shovelled on to them. It lasted until the early hours. 

10/10 for audio and 10/10 for visual and no CGI in sight, unless you believe in the simulated universe theory. 

I hired a bike and cycled to Don khone. The typical 70's style girls bike with the basket. After walking everywhere, recently, it felt like time travel. 

You cross from Dondet to Don Khone over an old, arched bridge. If I remember correctly, it was for the railway from the French occupation. I carried on to Somphamit, which is a pretty cool waterfall mixed in with a set of surging, snaking rapids. I worked my way, rockhopping, down to a set of rapids and sat next to them just to feel the energy, which again, was loud, violent abandon. 

A powerful display of 'don't F**k with me. Don't even get in my way'. I sometimes think mother nature would enjoy listening to death metal.

Speechless.

Buffalo Dog.

Blog 7


We've got chickens. They weave about you looking for anything worth scratching or pecking at. They are usually followed by a trail of cheeping fluff bags. I've got geckos that slap about the wall and ceiling and make noises much louder than physics should allow for their size. I've a dribbbly little ginger kitten sprawled on my stomach, right now. But it's my next door neighbour who wins any animal competition. He's got a dog that's a water buffalo. It's rubbish at catching balls though and you can't get it to chase sticks and you would also need a bin liner as a doggie poo bag. It's very well behaved though. I haven't heard it bark once. Buffalo are wide spread across the island and are often seen grazing under the shade of a tree on the walking path. They don't spook easy, unlike cows, and are quite friendly. They are partial to a good tickling behind the ear. Funnier faces than cows, as well. So, basically, what I'm trying to say is that a buffalo is a dead good cow but a rubbish dog. I came across an albino buffalo the other day. White bristles and pink skin. From behind it looked like a monster pig. Pigs are plentiful here and are more of the Vietnamese pot belly style. Very funny. Very friendly. Some of them look like they've been coloured in with crayon. the colours and patterns are great. Again their habitat is in the shade of a tree on the side of a path or under a thicket of bamboo and if they've got some shit to mooch in they are as happy as a pig in shit. Animals, people. All laid back here. It's difficult not to be. The scenery, where ever you are on the island, (Dondet) soothes you. The flow of the Mekong pacifies the monkey mind. The whole area is a natural sedative. People are always telling us to hurry up. Well, my faith lies in nature and nature's telling me 'What's the rush, man?' I don't intend on finding out but I wouldn't be surprised if it's physically impossible to be able to rush here. A chicken has just jumped up on to the table. I'm sure if it stays there long enough someone will shoo it off. It's about 12 inches out of range for me, so I'm helpless. Anyway, yeah, rushing. What a preposterous idea. Who thought that one up.
Speechless.

Time passes here with great difficulty.

Blog 6

Time passes through here with great difficulty. It gets stuck on stuff like trees and peoples minds. Out in the river channels you can see it gathering and sometimes, evaporating. Decades blending into each other. 

Others being lost from memory. 

It's about 1972 at the moment but you need to realise that tomorrow may herald the beginning of the sixties. This is due to the currents in the Mekong causing spiralling time thermals. It's all very scientific. Time doesn't totally stop here, it just slows to a sufficiently sensible and enjoyable speed, but I know through instinct that within about a mile from here it must come to a Total stand still. I'm not far away . I'm definitely close to the centre.

On my walk I discovered a new species of frog  I've named it the Laos puddle frog (Puddlus Froggus Laosus). It looks like your average frog but it lives in puddles. Even on a small island like this, out in the rice fields there is a temple/monastery and a healthy scattering of stupas. If you would like to hear an understatement of the view it would have to be surreally picturesque. Regardless of what you hear, traditional Mekong village life is going on all around you and like time on the river it is blending nicely with 1972. 

Of course there are signs of expansion but nothing too horrific. River life is interesting and abundant with photo opportunities. I've been to places like this before. They are very, very dangerous and if you're not careful, like time, you will get caught up too.
Speechless.

Tuk Tuk from the hostel.

Blog 5


Sabadee, Okay, one tuk tuk from the hostel to the bus station in Vang Vieng. One mini-bus from Vang Vieng to Vientiane. One sleeper bus ( haven't got a clue why they are called that) I was at the back and sometimes getting serious airtime.The rest of the time I was just getting gently pummelled. Comparable to a massage from an anxious sumo wrestler). from Vientiane to Pakse.
One mini bus from Pakse to Aintgotaclue (really, I don't know what it was called) One boat from Aint-got-a-clue to Don Det (Don Dhet). after being awake for approximately thirty five hours, I finally fell asleep, with my clothes on and Jimi Hendrix playing through the computer and slept heavily through until 7.30am this morning. I'm staying at the 'Easygo backpackers' on Don Det (Don Dhet). It's the sister hostel to Easygo in Vang Vieng. Both are super chilled and both are the cheapest place to stay. Usually works that way. So I got right up. I slipped on my t-shirt and shorts (nothing else needed, not even sandals) and did my first 'tour de Don det' Try saying that if you can't speak. The island is about 1km across and about 3km long. That's just a rough guess. Stop being lazy, google it. Then tell me. 'They' say it takes about 2 1/2 hours to walk around the island. I did it in about 4 hours walking like an Aussie from Darwin. Lots of hopefully good photos and video. My first port of call was a riverside shack for a Laotian black coffee. Sufficiently energised by the sublte coffee high, I hit the road...well, path.....well, narrow dirt track. You see the occasional moped pass by but the main transport is bicycle or foot. I prefer foot, it's about the right speed for this island. Walking barefoot slows you down even more and is the ideal speed around here.
Speechless.

The butterflies here take your breath away!

Blog 4

I've been mooching in some caves, limestone jobbies with small tunnels opening into huge chambers. the only word your able to mutter is 'f**k!' as you take a sharp intake of breath. They are truly awesome. They are truly freaky as well, as I've been going in alone with just my headtorch, f**king really freaky spooky man. 
These things go on for miles.The cave yesterday had really big spiders in it living in pitch blackness. 
You could easily get lost as there are many branches and if you follow them, they then branch off again and again and go on and on deep into the bowels. I got a bit confused yesterday as to where I was, only for a few seconds but, man, a few seconds of dread is a long time when you're in the bowels of the planet, on your own. 
There are some beautiful rivers to swim in. I rented out a old 70's style girls bike with a basket on the front for 15000 KIP (£1.50) and f**ked off, in amongst it, just roaming through spectacular scenery. It's great. I think I'm starting to get the knack of creating my own reality. 
Speechless .

Sabadee 🦂

Blog 3
Hiya all, or should I say Sabadee,
Just a brief update. I spent a few days in Bangkok getting over the flight, adjusting to the climate (approx. 33deg and 90% humidity) and trying to saturate myself in South East Asia. I couldn't decide whether to go to north Thailand or straight to Laos so I went to the train station and let them decide. So, I'm now in Laos. I took a train in the cheap seats carriage which was quite hard going, approx. 12 hours. I arrived in Nong Khai about 4 am with no sleep. I walked from the train station to friendship bridge on the Mekong about 1 mile. I got a local bus across the Mekong into Laos. 
Spent a bit of time in Vientiane, which is the capitol, being offered marijuana and heroin. I'm now in Vang Vieng, which was one of my favorite places in S.E.Asia. I didn't recognise it. It's full on tourism bullshit, full of 'hippy for a week' types. Whiskey addled backpackers. Happy pizzas (dope pizza), opium tea, pre rolled grass joints, bags of dope etc, all on the menu at many bars and restuarants. Thankfully, the countryside is still as stunning as ever. The mountains are cartoon-like. They're like something out of a Dr Zeus book. The villages are idyllic. I've been mooching around in the jungle and have found some primo wild camping sites. Thankfully, I've got me a DD hammock so I'm going to be off the ground as when I was climbing up the side of a jungle mountain the other day I came across a massive black scorpion. I knew it wasn't too toxic as it had big powerful pincers ( a sign of weak venom). it was the length of my hand from wrist to the tip of my middle finger. I took a photo of it with my hand next to it for comparison. It's called the Laos black forest scorpion. It's the largest species of Scorpion.
Speechless.

Risks I've had a few but then again too few to mention!

Blog 2

Hi all, I'm re-learning the art of irresponsibility, therefore, yes I can see a few risks coming up. 
May as well sit at home otherwise. Spent 10 days straight in my hammock before leaving. I've fallen in love with it. I will post some freaky photos of crazy places that I camp. 
I didn't realise that hammocking was such a huge thing. A real lifestyle. 
Taking a gopro and a camera this time so you will be able to see a bit more of it all this time. 
Yeah, f**k  it all man.  Sold my bike, kayak, everything, f***ed work off, people can go take a shit if they want owt doing by me. 
Got nothing now apart from the shit in my backpack. Got my lifesaver bottle. That's how I got typhoid last time.
Possesions are shit. I've owned nothing It's all owned me, and although it was a bit sad getting rid of my toys it's a nice relief. Freedom! Priceless! 
I hope I'm still as crazy as I used to be? 
Speechless .

Tales from the Speechless story teller.

Blog 1 

HI all, Had enough of all the bullshit so f**k it I'm off on a mad one again. 

Flying to Bangkok on Wednesday 28th September 2016. Heading up to Laos, Cambodia etc. 

Going to get off the tourist buzz and get away from backpackers etc. 

Got me a dd hammock and a 4.5x3mt tarp, both in camo so I can do some stealth camping along the Mekong and up in the jungle. Could be back in a couple of months, could be a couple of years. I never know when it comes to travelling. Been getting restless for a while now and can't stand this society and this culture anymore. Time to go black ops and drop off the radar again. Thinking of doing a blog. We'll see. There will probably be a lot of f**king swearing in it.  

Speechless.